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Procrastin woke me up in the middle of the night to yell at me. I had no idea how he found me or knew, not until he shoved my letter to Auroran in my face and then burned it after. I do not remember much of our argument; much of the sleep potion still sucked my eyelids down and weighted my body. It is pehaps why he worked so hard to wake me in the first place, or I suspect so, at least.

Much of that day was a blur, after. I spent time with Procrastin in Nagrand, helping to tend to some of the Netherrays he keeps. It reminded me of the times I spent assisting Astarin in the Golden Dawn stables, and then, later, the stables at the Harbinger's base, as well. I could have done without the attempts to turn my ears into snacks, however.

Later in the afternoon, we returned to Stormwind, and although I was very tired, and feeling considerably ill again, I agreed to have drinks with Procrastin. I do like spending time with him, and a selfish part of me was hoping to see Auroran more. Lingering in Procrastin's presence surely would be a benefit in that regard. I wish I could stop using people. Friends do not use friends like this, for their own personal gain or agenda. I can only hope neither realizes just how terrible a friend I truly am.

It soon got exceedingly crowded and quite rowdy within, and by this time, he had consumed some kind of powdery substance that quite altered his behavior. I have seen others use drugs before, have done so myself back in Silvermoon. But I had never seen someone behave like this before. It was fascinating and perplexing at the same time.

He was extremely... touchy. Kept petting my hair and ears, and hugging me. I should have minded, I suppose. He is not mine, after all, and I know that he had no control over himself. But it was so nice to have someone pay that kind of attention to me that I let him and said nothing. Eventually he had other business to attend to and left me to my own devices. I wandered the city for some time, as desolate as usual. Not enough to drink to pass out in alcohol-sated unconsciousness, and nothing to keep my thoughts from circling inwards again.

My feet found me at the Lamb, and there was an elf perched on the ramp's ledge. I recognized him from before, the day I first met Procrastin; but I had never caught his name.

I spent some time with him, both for lack of anything to distract, and because he was kind, and seemed as lonely as I. He told me I should be bothered by someone as dead and cold as he, and I am certain I would have been, at one point in my life. But he reminded me so much of Astarin. Everything these days reminds me of him, I suppose. It hurt, but it was the kind of hurt you keep going back for more of, even when you know it causes so much pain.

And regardless, my time in Silvermoon was often spent in the company of many other deaders. I have more respect for them and the Dark Lady than I should likely let on to anyone here. I am sympathetic to them as a whole, and enjoy their company, their wealth of knowledge and the certainty that they will last as long as I, will last longer than I, that they know what eternity will be, and that ultimately we are all alone in our own heads.

I very much enjoyed Ravek's company, too, and he seemed pleased, delighted with the little durotar scorpid I keep for my weapon poisons. And although we talked little and the conversation was stilted and awkward, he understood every word that I did say. That is a rarity that is too precious to waste, and I wish that his sister had not shown. I would have liked to have his company for longer than I did.

She tried, or threatened, to touch my ears. To touch me. I did not want /her/ near me. I think Ravek grew upset at me, in his absent fashion, for warning that I would gut her should she try. She left in a huff, and eventually, he left, too. Eventually, everyone has something better to do, or places to go, that do not involve me. I suppose I have no one to blame but myself.

The night was very long without him. Without anyone around.

---

I figured maybe I should start linking the songs I use during writing.
For Arenvald/Brackenglade:
http://www.lyricsmania.com/lyrics/william_elliott_whitmore_lyrics_38075/other_lyrics_68858/cold_and_dead_lyrics_667962.html